Can you believe it! I am 3 months old today! Oh, how time Fly's...

I am starting to really enjoy this little Girl as I can interact with her more and more. Her colic isn't as bad and she is a great night time sleeper.

Crazy, Wonderful, tearful Life

Wonderful, Crazy, Exhausting, Amazing, Emotional, Joy, Tough, Unconditional Love….

That sums it up! I am a Mom of a 12 week old. I love my daughter with all my heart, but this is harder than I thought. I am no longer concerned about my needs, but I have to take care of a helpless child. I have been around babies practically my whole life. I am good with babies; other people’s babies. Many thought I was baby whisperer. I have learned I am not, but I am learning. By Gods grace, I am learning

Mothers Day2012

 Colic, Acid Reflux, Puke, Tiny, Sweet, Adorable, Baby Doll…

That sums up my daughter. Even when she is crying so hard and I don’t know what to do with her, she is cute as a button. We have her colic and Acid reflux under control with Medication, but if she doesn’t get it on time what a cranky little girl she can be.

She smells momma and all she wants to do it eat. She can be scream blue murder in my arms, daddy takes her and she is all smiles. She coos and talks to him, for me she gives smiles, but rarely talks. DADDY’S Girls…Will she be like me and my daddy? I believe so!

Daddy's Girl: Studying with Daddy is the best

She is going to be a little thing her whole life. That is fine. She is in the less than 5%  for her age. But she loves to eat and only wants mommy’s milk from mommy. No bottles for her. I pray that as she gets older she will take a bottle, because I would love to leave her with a babysitter once a week so I can go back to tutoring.

These past 3 months have been exhausting, life changing but so wonderful. I never thought being a momma could be this trying. I am learning a lot about myself through this experience, but through the tears (mine and hers) and sweat I love her unconditionally. I am looking forward to her being older where I can interact with her more and more. What a joy she is.

One More Night in the Light

I was prepared to go home on Friday. I was excited to take my daughter home. It was time for the Pediatrician to come and discharge her and I was ready. All the nurses said she was healthy and she was such a good eater. Lilly's Pediatrician was not working that weekend, so his partner had to come and discharge her. She had a little bit of jaundice but nothing terrible so I was ready to go home.

My emotions that day I could tell were shaky. They say that when your milk comes in you become very emotional. Gary was at home getting last minute things done before we brought our baby girl home that afternoon, so I had to meet with the Dr all by myself with emotions on the rocks.

The Dr came and checked Lilly out, she had lost some weight and she had jaundice. So he wanted me to give her formula and to stay an extra night. Formula? Seriously? An extra night? My emotions erupted and tears started to flow. I told him that my milk was starting to come in and I was not going to give my baby formula unless she doesn't pick up the 30 grams he required for discharge. She had to stay under the lights to get her levels down. I was a basket case. I wanted my baby home. I was tired of being in the hospital. I wanted to sleep in my own bed next to my husband. I wasn't prepared for this.

Several nurses came into my room and helped me to calm down and explained that if they discharge Lilly and she gets sick she has to go into the pead ward where there are lots of germs and it is best for her to stay in the sterile environment of the Maternity Ward.

I called Gary sobbing and told him I needed him there. He came quickly. What a wonderful man. He handled his wife tears well. 

WE posted on Facebook for Prayers, so the whole world was sending up supplications to the Lord on Lilly's behalf.

I fed Lilly every 2 hours and she was under the light for little less then 24 hours. She hated the sunglasses they put on her and took them off several times, but when Pathcare came and retested her jaundice level Saturday morning they had dropped considerably. The nurse weighed her at 8am and  she hadn't gained much, so the Doctor said weigh her again at 4pm and call me. He said she didn't have to be under the lights any more. All I had to do on Saturday was concentrate on feeding her. I think the Dr saw how determined I was not to use formula so he didn't mention it again. I kept her in my room and fed her all day long. when it came time for her to be weighed again she not only gained the 30 grams the Dr wanted but she gained an extra 5 for good measure. The Lord was wonderful in answering the prayers.

Usually they don't discharge babies until they are 2.5 Kilos, but after discussing it with the Dr and assuring him I had a great support team at home he let us go home with the promise that we would get her weighed every week until she hit that mark. The first week she gained 110 grams ( she was now back at her birth weight) the following week she had gained 240 grams. We take her this thursday for her 3rd weigh in and we will see how much she has gained, I am guessing she is at the 2.5 kilo mark now but we will see. (Pic of Lilly after she was released from the lights, thing on head was for her jaundice check)

Premie, but sweet

For 8 months I had read all I could about pregnancy and labor. I had all this knowledge and I was ready. I was not nervous. I wanted a natural childbirth with no medication. I had said women have been doing this for centuries I can do it as well.

All the books told me not to expect your water to break like it does in the movies.  They say that it only happens that on rare occasions. I should of guessed that I would be that rare occasion, since I got PUPPPS, a rare pregnancy rash that only affects about 2% of first time pregnancies.

Gary and I borrowed the last three Star Wars movies from a friend. We started “Return of the Jedi” after dinner on Tuesday. This was my favorite one out of all of them because of the Ewoks. Near the end of the movie around 930 I felt as if I had lost all control of my bladder. I sat straight up and ran to the bathroom. I was highly embarrassed.  After coming back to bed and having to run to the bathroom a second time I started to wonder if it really was a bladder problem, or had my water broke. I told Gary of my suspicion and he asked if I was having contractions. I wasn’t. We finished the movie after having to take all the bedding of the bed, then headed to bed around 10pm. 30 minutes later I started to feel some discomfort in my lower abdomen. I started to time what I thought could be contractions. As I was doing this it hit me that If I was in labor this baby was going to be born on leap year, another rarity. An hour later I woke Gary up (if you know Gary; that is a hard thing to do) and told him I was having contractions every 7-10 minutes apart. He quickly went online and it said if your water breaks call the Doctor. After speaking with my Doctor he told me to go to the hospital right away, because if your water breaks then there is chance of an infection getting to the baby.

We arrived at Durbanville Medi-Clinic sometime after midnight. The nurse checked me right away and I wasn’t even dilated. But my water had indeed broke. She hooked me up to the monitor and my contractions to her were very small. I was thinking if these are small contractions then am I going to be able to do this drug free. They took me out of the labor ward and put me in a hospital room since first time mom’s labors last usually a long time. My contractions quickly got closer and closer together and more and more painful. Sister Mavvy, my nurse,  asked me if I was sure I wanted to do this with out any drugs since I was already in so much pain and I had a long night ahead of me. I was determined. She hooked me up to the monitor again and still my contractions were showing to be very small. The problem was the monitor was high on my abdomen and all my contractions were down low. I gave in asked for pethadine. It helps you to relax. Once she gave it to me I was able to rest the few short minute’s in-between contractions. Sister Mavvy could see how much pain I was in and again asked “ If There is something out there that can take the pain away why don’t you use it.” At that point I was all for taking the pain away.

 Around 430 am I told Gary they needed to check me again because I felt like I needed to push. They took me back to the Labor ward and I was 8 cm dilated and I had missed the window for an epidural. Gary and I were like ok Lord we said we wanted to do this without one so I guess you are saying helping us keep that.  Dr Deale showed up shortly after. I was screaming. There was no more breathing techniques that would help.

Deale said we are doing the epidural, she is going to be laboring like this for another hour. The problem with doing the epidural was that I was having one contraction after the other with no breaks in-between and I was to be perfectly still while he inserted the medicine into my spine. After several attempts the doctor said that if I didn’t sit still he was not going to be able to do it. Gary bear hugged me and made me immobilized through his strength. Deale got the epidural in and I was almost instantly numb. 45 minutes later with the help of forceps and an episiotomy little Lilly came into the world. She weighed in at 2.02 kilo grams and was 45 cm long.

So it just shows you can read all you want, but nothing will prepare you for how your body will handle labor. 

Blessings

God has been so good to Gary and I. He has given us such a loving Community all around us that has blessed us time and time again, not just here in South Africa, but also in the US as well.

We recently were thrown a baby shower for the soon arrival of little Lilly. It is amazing how much stuff we were given. God is so good.

We thank all those who came and blessed us beyond words can say. We also want to thank all of you who have given so much to Gary and I in this year of firsts for us :)

Sweetest Aroma, NEW LIFE

I met a lady at church Sunday evening. She is a mother of five. We were talking about babies and deliveries. She told me that during one of her pregnancies she was reading Genesis 3. She could not understand how God could use birth pains as a discipline. She began meditating on the subject and then realized the similarities to Christ earthly ministry, death and resurrection and that of pregnancy and birth.

During Christ’s earthly ministry he endured hardships. He had friends die. He was tempted. He was betrayed. During the 40 weeks of Pregnancy a soon to be mother experiences lots of body aches and pains. She endures hardships. She is sick for several months, hoping that what she eats will stay down. Her body aches as it makes room for the child that grows within. She constantly in the end has this thing within her kicking her in the most uncomfortable of places.

Right before Christ arrest he asks the “Lord take this cup from me, but YOUR will be done”. As a woman comes close to her time of delivery and she starts to think about what is going to happen, fear strikes her and she wonders “what was I thinking, seriously. This baby has to come out, but Lord cant you bring this baby out some other way”.

 In Christ’s death he experienced excruciating pain. He was beaten and tortured and nailed to a tree. But through that death brought the sweetest aroma, LIFE. What could be more glorious then seeing new life come from your pain? God told Eve “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children.” Child birth is painful. It is excruciating, but it is only for a moment, and after that moment of pain the Dr places that sweet new life into your arms and it’s completely worth all the tears sweat and blood.

I just loved this analogy when Pipa told me. It was so just so beautiful. We might not truly be able to comprehend all that Christ did on our behalf. But as women we can know that Christ understands the JOYS and Pains we go through to bring forth New Life into this world.

A Traditionally Busy Life

Life for the Isaacs house hold has not slowed down. Even though I am a stay at home wife and soon to be mother I feel I am on the go all week long. It is good to not be idle. The first few months here when i was not as busy I started to feel like there was only so many times I could clean our tiny little home. But now I struggle to fine the time to clean it in a week times. Gary is busy with work, more now then ever now that the Church is looking for a Pastor. And in all of this we are anxiously awaiting the arrival of our little girl Lillian "Lilly" Christine.

Monday is Gary's day off and we try to make that our family day. We do our shopping plus we do what ever else we want for example go to the beach, or rent movies, or go for a drive. We hope to continue this tradition as our family grows.

Tuesdays is my day to be at home. It is nice to have one day at home a week to get organized and try hard to get the house clean or at least part of it. These days scrubbing one part of the house makes me so tired. It is usually laundry day unless it is raining then I have to get up early some other time in the week so I can get my clothes on the line to dry before 9. (the line gets sun only from about 10-2) Gary teaches a bible study on Tuesday mornings and then usually comes home to work. It is hard for me not to talk to him on these days because I have been by myself all day and I am eager to chat, but I have to let him get his work done.

On Wednesday's Gary and I go to Aristea Primary School and help with in the special learners class for 3 hours. We have really started to get to know our kids there and they have started to open up to us. I will be sad when the school year ends, because I will not be going next year since I will be in my third Trimester  and I am sure extremely uncomfortable. But Gary will continue and we are praying that some others from the church will step up and help out as well. In the Evenings we go to a Bible study right down the street from us. Gary is leading that one as well.

Thursday I go to the Ladies Bible Study which Gary is teaching. We just finished a study on the book of Job . It has been such a blessing.

Friday's I go back to Aristea and Gary goes to other local Primary school to counsel. He has really enjoyed this and has developed some good relationships  with some of the kids there. He has even invited them to come to youth and Sunday School and by Gods grace some have attended. That is one of our main reasons of wanting to get involved in the schools is to invite these kids to church. Friday evenings we are on the meal plan at Gary's Parents, another tradition we hope to keep as our family grows. I love how my sisters kids are close to my parents and since my parents are so far away I want my children to be close to Gary's.

Lilly will be the 4th girl in Three generations of Isaacs (Gary's Aunt and to Female Cousins. All his cousins and his brother only have boys) so every one is very excited about her coming into the world. When the Doctor told us that he was 99% sure is was a girl Gary did a little dance in the Sonar room. I had been having dreams for weeks about a little girl, but I kept refering to the baby as a he, we both were ecstatic about the news of a little girl. The only thing about a little girl is they turn into Teen age girls and that intimidates me. Soon after we found out it was a girl Gary said  with a big smile on his face "That means I get to go on 'daddy and me date' ". I told him a long time ago about how special "daddy and me dates" where to me. My daddy would take me for Chinese  and then we would go see a movie together. I can still name all the movies we saw together.  I look forward to Gary carrying on that tradition with our little girl.

Life is busy but we are enjoying it. God has blessed us undoubtedly and we are truly thankful for his provisions.